I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
