Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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