fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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