those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
