I'm drive I can fine osifer
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
