is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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