see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize