this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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