and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
