So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
