My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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