I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
