so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
