the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
