Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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