UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
