I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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