just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
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