I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize