At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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