You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize