I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
