would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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