everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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