What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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