Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
