You just made me feel so damn special
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
