Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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