and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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