I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
