have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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