I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
