I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
