brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
