She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize