I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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