Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
We need a shit load of segways right now
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
