Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
