just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
