I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
