just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize