we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize