I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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