Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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