Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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