singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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