He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
