her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
