That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
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