Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize