I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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